Not what I expected...

I have seriously rewritten this post THREE times (Even more in my head) and I still can’t figure out how I want to say it. Where is Brighton when I need him?

July has always been my favorite month. Heck, my birthday is in that month, I get two paid days off during that month, and most of my vacations fall during that month. It can’t get any better right? Wrong. Brighton and I are expecting our first little one July 4th!!
There I said it. I can’t take it back. Why has it been so hard for me to tell? I am not sure. This whole pregnancy thing has been very SURREAL for me and totally not what I expected. I am still not sure I am fully enjoying it but the idea is still growing on me. LOL get it, growing on me? Okay I am done.

I am now 17 almost 18 weeks along and doing a whole lot better. I wasn’t too sick the first couple of weeks just SUPER SUPER tired. I am pretty sure in all of my preparation and reading ‘being tired’ never came up. I could not get enough sleep. I was barely on time to work every day, sleeping during lunch and falling asleep as soon as I got home. I have been tire before but I have always gotten over it. Man I was tired for weeks on end and definitely not enjoying it. Exercising was totally out for me. Also, the whole smell thing made me ornery. I was not nauseated (like I was planning on) but certain smells made me want to kill people. And foods and that I once loved became nasty to me and my desire to eat went down. That is rare. The holidays were not as fun as they usually are because I couldn’t stand the smell of any of the foods (thinking about it still makes me…) and I was so tired that socializing with family was a chore. I am not sure why anybody wanted to talk to me.

Then around 11 weeks the nausea hit and throwing up, well let’s just say it happened a lot. But that honestly did not bother me as much as the smells and exhaustion. LOL, it bothered Brighton though. Seeing him plugging his ears and hearing the radio volume go up while I am throwing up outside of the car, makes me laugh. He told me he was this close to joining me on the side of the car. What a sight that would have been.

Next week we get to find out what we are having!! I am hoping once we find out this whole experience will be more real to me. My little tummy is growing more but I still just feel fat. In some of my clothes you can’t even tell that I am pregnant. Some days that is nice but other days I want my outside to show what I am feeling on the inside. I guess I need more patience. That will happen eventually.

Overall, I am excited though. Not enjoying the journey, but excited at the chance that we get to be parents. Here is to July and all the fun it brings!!!!

p.s. taking this picture was the most awkward thing I have done. I had to wear the tightest shirt I own and Brighton kept telling me to stop sucking it in. I still don't know how I feel about it.